Caught 2
from member John, 2005
Another boy caught by mom
I've been masturbating for as long as I can remember. We used to have
a TV and a couch in my basement, and as a small child I can remember
how much I liked being alone down there at night. I used to turn the
lights off and watch TV. There were things I saw on TV that
stimulated me - I don't remember exactly what, because its too
difficult to put myself back into the mindset of a child of 5 or 6.
But when I did get stimulated, what I used to do was push the couch
away slightly from the wall, climb up on the ridge, and hump the couch
while I continued to watch TV. There was this delicious feeling I
used to get from rubbing against the couch - because the rubbing and
humping made my peter dance around in my PJs. The feeling would build
like a wave, radiating outwards from my crotch until it threw this
electric shock all theough my body.
While I was doing this, I was conscious of the footsteps upstairs. I
knew what I was doing was dirty, and I knew that no one should know
that I did this. Sometimes I would be up there on the ridge of the
couch, and I would hear my mother's heels approach the basement door.
It was like a race - if I wasn't far enough into it, I could force
myself to stop, climb down from the couch and push it back against the
wall.
But one time she approached the door at exactly the worst moment-just
as that wave started. So I couldn't stop. My head knew something bad
would happen, but my body couldn't stop what it was doing because that
electric feeling was starying to build. I heard her heels on the
stairs while I was still humping madly. And when I opened my eyes,
she was standing at the bottom of the stairs, shocked at what she saw
- her little boy humping a couch. Like a dog.
"What are you DOING!" She seemed almost frightened. Shocked at the
realization that there was a rabid little animal into what she thought
was her sweet little boy.
Me - I was red with shame. I didn't answer her. Even if I wanted to
I couldn't have explained it, because I didn't understand what I was
doing. We never spoke of this. But I didn't stop. I still watched
TV at night in the dark. I still climbed up on the couch at least once
a night. Only now when she needed to come downstairs for something,
she always approached the door slowly. Very slowly.