BLACK BOX WARNING
FOR SATIRE-IMPAIRED READERS

The PeterFiles web site, PeterFilesGuidance discussion group, Onania Journal, and PeterFiles Blog contain satire, humorous exaggerations, fictional claims, and intentional misrepresentations of facts about the subject of masturbation for the purpose of producing amusement in sophisticated readers.

In naive and clueless males, PeterFiles may cause confusion, feelings of guilt and shame, embarrassment, diminished self esteem, abstinence, and temporary or permanent loss of sexual gratification.

If you are satire-impaired, irony-challenged, experiencing reduced or dysfunctional sense of humor, or otherwise have difficulty distinguishing satire from reality, you are advised to read no further.

PETERFILES IS NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR CONSEQUENTIAL DAMAGES DUE TO PERSONAL  FRUSTRATION, LOSS OF SEXUAL GRATIFICATION, ALIENATION OF THE GENITAL ORGANS OR LOST MASTURBATORY OPPORTUNITIES ARISING FROM READER MISINTERPRETATIONS.